Celebrate a soon to be more frequent meteorological event with two minute dance parties in living rooms everywhere.

Au Revoir Simone - Fallen Snow (Teenagers remix)

Substantially less hated than the TSA (that recently started a fucking blog, with humor no less!), local brownstone band Professor Murder seems nevertheless to be buying into paranoid theories about their incidental relationship to the SoCa scene. We at TMYLM are never ones to shy away from controversies, and since we’d rather devote our love to Professor Murder instead of blog whipping boys the NYPD, we’ll go ahead and post a little remix that just came our way… And to prove that PM may or may not be so late on the bandwagon its like local positivist philolsopher gone wrong, compare it to the old Dutch Hex which kicked major fucking ass.

Professor Murder - Dutch Hex (Max Pask Murdub Mix) removed by request of someone
Professor Murder -Hutch Dex

You can’t take any old Caribbean beat and turn it into hot shit, can you? Soca? Really?

Time to breaks you off with some real dancehall bangaz:

Jahcoozi - Double Barrell Name (Siriusmo Mix)

Booty Cologne - 8 Drunk Gods (ft Top Cat)

We don’t normally do this at TMYLM but a particularly abject night leads us to a reposting of this delicious DJ Hoff mix, which came to us via the Neutered Noel via The Sweet Fix via Discobelle (via ethanol subsidies powering electricity, newly responsible for fucking bagels rising to over $1).

DF Hoff - Stereo! Mix

Oh for a time when cold gray Brooklyn meant enchantment and you walked into O’Connors and the warmth and the dirt sent a tingle. And you talked about the mayoral race and Sandy Endo and local politics because you half-way believed in it. Calexico covered Love, the Rhino Girl Groups box-set blared, and things were looking good. Now it’s huevos a la mexicana every weekend and pop-fuck-electro and (if you’re lucky) dancing at some bouncer-ridden club where you can’t bump into anyone for fear of rumpling their glitter.

Toni Basil - I’m 28

Calexico - Alone Again Or (live)

Hyper Crush - Candy Store

Cat Scratch - What Would Harley Do?

Winner, epic-as-fuck song with longest title from 2005 that we didn’t know about til 2008:

Johnny Boy - You Are the Generation That Bought More Shoes and You Get What You Deserve

You know that impulse you get when you’re watching some awesome old tv trash (especially the kind curated by the tastemakers at TV Carnage), that little productivity demon in the back of your head which incessantly gnaws “Sample this! Remix the shit out of it!” And the laziness angel responds, “but the couch is so comfortable, and the internet so interesting, and you just got a new email!”

Well, we bitch-slapped that angel and exercised our demons, grabbing some choice clips from one of the tv carnage discs. Here it tis for you, dear reader.

TV Carnage - Selected Audio Clips (tellmeyouloveme rip)

Including!

Air Mauritius
Alone in Your Electric Chair
Cheat and Eat
Fame
The Few the Proud
Hairdresser
Hot Cop Porno Theme
Inflatable Cube Breakdancing Theme
The Dirty Cowboy
Respect the Mentally Disabled
Shalom Shalom

Tellmeyouloveme reader (and lover of all things red) Girltron sends us a few ditties: a backbeat-heavy, foot-stomping jam by French Kicks, a grrrrl-groups rager with a choo-choo-train bassline, and a brass-heavy, drunken he-diva version of Toxic, featuring the one and only Dirt McGirt (cuz dirt don’t hurt). Thassalot of hyphens!

French Kicks - Knee High
The What Four - I’m Gonna Destroy That Boy
Toxic - Mark Ronson (feat. ODB & Tigger)

piece of cake. let’s bake it!

snoop dogg - sensual seduction

this shit’s the boom bangingest:
Lil Boosie and Lil Webbie - Wipe Me Down Remix

Without the aplomb and will of a sweater wandering into a suit, it takes a rare band or person to successfully remix drunk singing favorite I Will Survive (curiously unsung at the last karaoke gathering) without falling into full out camp. But before ‘Satisfaction Guaranteed’ became a rallying cry for rubber-obsessed internet fans, Erasure in 1991 managed to pull off a great version that could appease both lovers of intense synth and Gloria Gaynor impersonators. The track remains as ripe today.

Erasure - I Love to Hate You